vomitous materials

just talked to sarah, and she's sick. i told her that in that case, i'm not touching the bag of jane's 'vomitous materials' that tracy left behind at my place. i will always remember my first aid instructor, peter ko, who way back in the fall of 2004 said the phrase 'vomitous materials' while making a finger scooping motion towards his mouth. that's the kind of thing that a girl remembers forever.

i've just had 7 days of visitors at the coachman. it started on thursday when the bethany part of b. shoults squared called me at work from mom and dad's. i picked her up on the way home and it wasn't until we pulled in to my place that i realized that she didn't have a bag with her. "why didn't you say anything?" she accused me, of all people! i had to leave her to drive some furnitures downtown but when i got back we had pizza. bethany chose the bbq chicken and i chose the chorizo and goat cheese. we got 4 dips so we each could have 2 of our own. if you care to know we each favoured the cheesie cheddar dip as our number one dip. same page on the dips. we ate pizza and watched the first two episodes of north and south (not the made for tv movie with patrick swayze and kirstie alley). when i stopped the movie to go to bed i told bethany she could continue but had to save the ending to watch with me. she vowed that we needed to watch it together.

this is where the treachery comes in. upon arriving home from work on friday afternoon two-ish, i asked bethany what she had done that day. the guilty truth spilled out of her like milk chugging out of a 4 litre jug. she had watched all the rest of north and south including the ending! !!?!! i was shocked and horrified but at the same time knew why she did it. once you start--you just can't stop.

friday night bethany, heather and i went to see momma mia. but first we had two stops. stop 1 was to pick up some haagen dazs from superstore. heather and i each got a dulce de leche and bethany got a half baked ben and jerry's. stop 2 was at mom and dad's to have dinner with mom. she made a really yummy meal of roasted chicken, boiled potatoes, beets and beat greens and corn on the cob. then we played a rousing game of boggle. mom noted that she had been playing with dave, bethany's father in law that morning and beat the pants off of him, and earlier she mentioned that having dave around made dad feel really healthy and he was giving dave lots of tips. heather said she should have played with dave, and i said ya, hanging around dave makes people feel smart and healthy. that gave us a little chuckle.

then we went to see momma mia. mom disapproved. i think she was probably right. i liked the singing and the funny parts but so much was crude and amoral. i think it would be really fun to bin in a musical. or to make one up.

saturday morning bethany helped me clean up the apartment and then we went shopping for sarah's birthday present. we didn't have much time before we had to pick her up from the ferry but we made the most of what time we did have. we were what we like to call productive shoppers. we went to a shop called bellies and beyond on west 10th and found a cute green maternity dress on sale. we halfed it and then in some other cute shops around there bethany found a purple scarf and i found a delicate leafe necklace with a small purple bead on it. i also found myself an awesome red purse on sale.

bethany was feeling queesy all this day.

we picked up sarah from the ferry and sarah tells the rest of the story of that day. you can read it on her blog http://burtbear.blogspot.com/ (if you don't already know) . we dropped sarah off at mom and dad's and the neighbour's cat waltzed inside. i found it weaving around the darkened family room at the feet of one dave shoults. he was sitting straight up on the couch (well as straight as dave can be) and was sound asleep. kinda disconcerting.

i didn't get to bed until around 2 and got up at 6:30 the next morning to plan my primary lesson. didn't remember it was fast sunday until after i was at church. i'm a bad bad person. bethany didn't remember either but she didnt' have scoff down the handful of blueberries that i had that morning. ah well. i was so tired that i didn't see how i was going to make it through sacrament meeting. but i did.

i played kindness twister with my primary kids--don't ask. we also acted out the good samaritan with my stellar props, which included a frog toque for the robber and the yellow lole (laugh out loud everday) fanny pack for the good samaritan who was riding a donkey that looked eerily like the sheep fatima gave me. so far i really like all my kids but i haven't had them all yet.

after church bethany fried up some veggies in a very yummy manner and i cooked some salmon and we put them together in a wrap with some chili pepper cheddar and all together it was quite delicious and i shouldn't have doubted bethany's plan at all. i blame it all on my utterly tired state, which utterly tired state drove me to have a nap. then beatnick and i made part of the sex in a pan for sarah's b-day potluck and drove out to ma and pop's.

potluck was yummy (or yammy, as yook would say). i was a bit off though. irritable and sensitive, i guess still from the lack of sleep. amy was there when we got there. bethany and amy worked on the family story some more. i don't think it will ever be finished now because they're both going far far away. i'll have to mail them pieces.

i hogged everyone that night and stuffed them all into my car. amy had to sit on bethany and there was no room for adriel's play pen in my trunk. we stopped at safeway on the way home to get sarah some anti-hista-means and adriel some milk. after kyle came back, whinnie the car would not start. we tried starting her a bilion times and when that didn't work and the jump didn't work (kyle swore it wasn't the battery, but i was hoping against hope that it was) we sent the girls and babe and half a babe home and i called a tow truck. the tow truck took longer than an hour to come and in that time kyle and i played crazy eights and fart. i didn't know fart before but now i do, and it's fun. it involves making fart noises at times. kyle's farts were gross.

the tow truck that came had a huge flat bed and we thought maybe whinnie was going to be hoisted right up on top. but no they did it the regular way. she didn't like it one bit. tow truck driver towed us the couple of blocks to my house. there was absolutely no parking left on the street so he dumped whinnie in the alley and helped us push her down the ramp. then the guy who's parked kitty corner to me helped us back her into her spot.

that's when we gave sarah her present. we made her put it on right then. she looks so cute in it. adriel got his own bed and sarah and kyle went to bed in my bed. after this was when i discovered that i didn't know where elicia's pump for the air mattress was. so amy ended up sleeping on a cushionless couch, bethany on the cushions, and me with a couple of odd pillows under strategic locations of ma body. again to bed around 2.

what sleep i did get wasn't too bad. adriel was up and chasing kitties and saying cute things by 7 in the morning. i tried to shut out his little cute voice but it was to no avail. so we were all supposed to go out to the fair in abby but thanks to my car problems, which are long and boring so i won't share, we had to send bethany off without us because that's where dave was going to be and they were leaving that afternoon. which gave us no joy, i might add. but in the end everything was ok, because my mechanic came and my car problems weren't too bad and we drove elicia's car in the mighty heat out to abby afterall.

first we stopped at mcdonald's for mcgriddles.

it was soooooo hot at the fair! we had pina colada slushies and looked at sheep, cows and miniature horses, watches some of 'bc idol' and then it was already time for bethany to go. since bethany was gone and we were so hot, we left after that.

we drove all the way to burnaby before almost dying of thirst. that's when i stopped at a chevron for some drinks. i bought two waters--that's how thirsty i was. our next stop was lululemon at oakridge where sarah got some cute pants and i got a canada day inspired sports bra. kyle got adriel some chicago style kernal's popcorn which means cheese and caramel together which is a suprisingly delicious combo. amy and i dug into it whole heartedly. while we were sitting waiting for sarah to come out and show us her various pants adriel led us all in some head bopping to the beat.

next we had to get a beard papa in richmond. amy and kyle insisted on calling it bearded pappa but they're WRONG dead WRONG. you have to line up for beard papas and sometimes you have to wait for another 15 minutes for the next batch to arrive. beard papas are the best cream puffs ever. read about them here http://www.muginohousa.com/ . after that we had to have korean food. we found the korean food area of robsen and picked a place that looked good. i got a squid dish but didn't like it that much. the squid was good, but i didn't like the spice that much. i like amy's and kyle's dishes the best. kyles' was in a stone bowl with a raw egg and other stuff and you stir it around it cooks the egg because the stone bowl is so hot. amy's was super savory like sticky rice wraps. she had sweet potato noodles and pork and veggies on rice.

then we drove kyle to the ferry. he had to cut gelato from his list of "have to do's." he was all have to have beard papas and then didn't seem very impressed by them. like shrug, they were ok, kind of thing.

sarah cut my hair that night and although she swears she cut it on an angle, by the time it dried it was curiously all one length. we played consequences and were exceedingly giddy due to excessive tiredness. one of the stories featured andreas who we made into a very gross individual.

"moist on the upperlip and slithery toungued
mudsy
wearing a short purple quilting inspired jakut over hand-knit chunky stockings on thick legs--feet stuffed into multi-coloured crocheted slippers
testing out what happens wen one puts freshly cut toenails in the toaster oven
met slightly puffy and covered in a thick sheen of sweat
andreas pack-'em-ham
emitting tiny bits of flatulence with each bum-clenched step; after each one, blushing deep and mortified, he'd mutter a soft "excuse me..."
he said "when i lick between my toes--you know, for cleaning? well...there really IS jam there!!"
she said "do you have the hershey squirts?""

that one was a near hysterics incident. i was just barely able to hold it back. there were other moments of pure genius born from fatigue but this one represents us all working together for a common goal. when we were writing them, it wasn't uncommon to hear "i'm sorry about this one." "no I'M sorry..." as the paper was passed along.

tuesday i got off early from work and met sarah and amy at granville island where we indulged in something from stewart's bakery. amy got the apple pie cheese cake that sarah and i shared last november. she gave me a bite and my mouth had to open so high that i'm sure i repulsed some passerbys. sarah and i had a hard time deciding and amy was done before we made our order. in the end i picked the fresh raspberry tart and a cinnamon record wheel, and sarah got the napoleon square. both were very satisfying.

we stopped at old navy in richmond before going to mom and dad's for dinner. sarah and i bought the same shirt. amy got a cute flirty skirt. we had a good dinner with ma and pops and then persuaded them to come with us to the beach even though it was getting late and not as hot. we went to centenial beach in tswassen which is where i go bird watching in the winter. the sun was setting and it was so beautiful. you felt like you were in a basin surrounded by orange tinged blue mountains and a darkening blue sky. the beach was nice and sandy in some places and smooth pebbled in others. there were these big fire circles there for beach bon fires and dad got busy making a fire--helping some teens get theirs going while he was at it. he also made some friends with some other people who joined the fire. but we went a swimmin. it took sarah a long time to get in because of adriel but amy and kept ourselves busy. it was so fun to swim with a sister or two. so soul satisfying. the best swimming is with sisters. amy and took turns holding the other down in the water so we could look up at the sky from under water. there were so many things i wanted to take pictures of. big boufant returned. sarah joined us for some quick wild swimming and then we gathered round the fire.

sometime during the swim i cut a big chunk out of the bottom of my foot and then ground dirty sooty sand into it.

on the way home sarah changed brazenly in the back seat. i stayed in my suit and when we stopped at the 711 for some chocolate, i stayed in the car, just narrowly missing the notice of smouldering eyes who i saw looking out the front door of his donair shop. back at home, sarah fixed my hair into more of an angled cut and thinned out the bottom wedge curls and we watched part of north and south with amy where she doled out 5 cent candies to us one at a time. we all agreed that the candies were the freshest softest candies ever.

when sarah and i were getting ready for bed we made my hair into ugly hair dos and then we took pictures of the deed with her phone and laughed about it.

wednesday was my last day of company. after work i met up with amy, sarah, andreas, and adriel (me and sarah were the losers without an 'a' name) we went to the mall in richmond to look for kyle's bird-day present and then met up with mudsy and pops at the mongolie grill. we all got good eats there. dad was off on his guess by 2 cents. i put lots of fat noodles on mine because i'm a lover of the fat noodles. i also put in lamb, prawns, sweet and sour pork and scallops and meaty shitake mushrooms. adriel broke a glass and a piece flew across the under table and hit my leg. our waiter jason was not as likable as we would have wished.

then i drove everyone to the ferry and went home to my quiet empty house and quiet cats. no more fun sisters, no matter where i looked. i put hydrogen peroxide on my foot and bandaged it up. i think it's getting better.

2 picture posts below. don't skip 'em.