weird liquid queen of my atria and ventricles

speaking of healing :) it has been intriguing to watch my thumb mend.  yea it is marvelous unto me.  really.  it went from deep bloody ragged gouge to  smooth pink flesh.  tender flesh.  very sensitive still.  but pink and whole.  there's a scar but if you didn't know you might not notice it.  i know however, and i like to look at it and marvel about bodies.

i felt pretty cute this morning.  i was wearing a new barrette that i bought at simons.  it's a rose gold bow and it looked super cute if i say so myself.  when i was getting into the car my head pressed against the roof, #talltorsoproblems, right on the right spot of my barrette to open it and it tumbled to the ground outside.  nononono, you don't do me like that sahib! i jumped out and retrieved my new pretty before one of the crows could claim it for himself.  they like shiny pretties.

 i wore my pinkitty pink sweatshirt and somehow i managed to keep it on all day.  how did i manage this feat of endurance??  no way to tell.  pure tenacity probably.

i have a friend with who i often engage in sarcastic sparring.  he always calls me bad girl.  last night i started correcting him.  no, this is awesome woman, i said.  he resisted.  i insisted.  always in funny sassy ways because that's how i do.  he said "i never met awesome woman, i only met bad girl."  "hi nice to meet you, i'm awesome woman" i was quick to retort.  "says who?" he asked a number of times.  my only answer was "me."  "since when?" was his next question.  "since always." i affirmed.  this morning he tried again, "good morning bad girl."  "nope sorry, wrong number.  this is awesome woman." i replied.  he started to weaken and by the end of the exchange he admitted that i was indeed awesome woman.  i was like a little irritated because he sounded condescending and the victory was moot because i only cared about my opinion about myself.  "congratulations, for seeing the obvious." i muttered to myself.  i should pretend i'm in battle with him when my negative self-talk starts.  i'll win every time.  haha

today in a unit meeting dave was saying that i'm not very nice and i wasn't doing anything un-nice.  i said "between the 2 of us one of us isn't being nice and it's not me."  then he laughed and said "okay b**chy." i smiled and repeated "between the 2 of us one of us is being _ _ _ _ _ _ (i didn't say it), but it isn't me." and we all kind of laughed.

my pinkies are my only 2 nails still sparkly from spa night last week.  today someone asked me if i only painted my pinkies.  haha.

oh my gosh i just remembered.  yesterday i watched  my octopus teacher on netflix and fell deep deep deeply in love.  first the filming is gorgeous.  the whole thing is like my wonder dream.  exploring an otherworldly under water world in all it's tiny and amazing and intricate details.  this guy, a photographer from south africa, was burnt out.  he couldn't photograph anymore.  the only thing he could think of to heal was to get in touch with nature.  so he started exploring kelp forests in the atlantic.  he talks about them like they are real forests.  he went diving every day.  not with scuba gear.  just flippers and a mask.  after a while, literally immersed in this world, wink wink, he finds his creativity again and starts filming and photographing the world and the creatures. and he discovered this octopus.  this brings me to my second of all--octopus!  octopi fascinate me.  they are so fluid and weird and beautiful and intelligent.  he tracks and watches this octopus every day for a year.  he learns so many things about octopuses that science hadn't discovered yet and he builds a  relationship with her that is full of curiosity and tenderness.  ahhhh.  it bit my heart in two--i couldn't love it more.  i was in it.  i was mesmerized.  i was there.  my heart beat wild love for octopus warrior queen.  i didn't' want it to end.  i might watch it again and again.  it might become the theme movie for my life.

i leave you with some pictures of 2 sisters and a ginger imp on a march day 5 years ago.