well it's sunday evening and i am on my porch. if there is one thing i believe in, it is the healing power that comes from being outside. what is it? i don't know exactly. i know it's something spiritual. i know it's something from God. one of his special gifts to us. a grace. a tender mercy. i remember a workshop once by shelley murley. she said that God's creations are ways he tells us he loves us. and i believe that's true. and he tells us over and over and over and over every day. it's there to tap into in any given miraculous moment of any day. i'm grateful when i have eyes to see it.
so time outside is part of my plan to be better and feel better. i set up my camping cot on the porch. even on days after work when i am so tired i can at least relax and be outside on my porch. i even rigged up my tarp so i can make shade and privacy for when the sun is beating in at that certain angle.
last saturday i decided to go on a old time photo walk and adventure. i don't know if on those walks i every create any master piece photo. i just explore and enjoy and i do it through the medium of my lens and i enjoy it. it breathes life and enjoyment into me. i walked and clicked for 5 or 6 hours last saturday. i covered so much ground, and it wasn't until i was home that i noticed that my lower back ached and my feet (the whole time in flip flops) felt like caving in if i tried to walk on them. i love those moments of being lost in something. if i ever get those photos done, i'll do a post about it.
because the next day i got a text that huxley was coming and i jumped in stella midnight and drove to kelowna. i got there just as he was born and i walked in just as they were cutting the umbilical cord. i drove home the next night after doing a 3 or 4 hour photo shoot..it takes longer for babies ok. (oh kyle you really know nothing about newborn photo shoots, said sarah with a roll of an eye, when he questioned us on our projected time frame).
but more than just photos, i got to be a part of something special. i got to sing and jiggle huxley to sleep while sarah fainted off the toilet, and i got to look into his little wrinkled fresh face and wonder from where he just came and who and what he had just freshly known. did he see anyone for me. were mine there waiting? i may have silently asked him that. i got to focus on his little ear, and his tiny wrinkled feet and take clicks of him in the embrace of his parents. i got to soothe him to sleep by rubbing between his eyes and i got to see my sister and her hubby in action as new again mom and dad. i got to help and be there. kyle was the bestest husband. he made us yummy meals, did the dishes, did the laundry, assisted in photos, did whatever was needed.
i was there only about 24 hours..just under, but i felt lucky. and i had a prayer about it as i drove out of town that evening. because i know i'm blessed. heavenly father gave me a gift that helps me connect with people. a way to share with them the special moments. a way to be a part of things that i don't get to be a part of otherwise. and i know it's a special gift to me.
i'm still working on hux's pics.
yesterday was starting out looking like a downer. i decided to change it up by using my go outside strategy. so i drove to tsswassen and got subway and went to centenial beach. got a blanket, and some crossward puzzles and spent some time on the sand in the sun. the tide was so far out you could barely see the water. there were a few families here and there. later when my hand was in the shade and i was feeling cold, i got up and walked down the beach and explored. there is so much peace and joy to be found, losing oneself in God's world. i found some shells and i took some pictures with my phone. the tide was racing back in and there were 5 or 6 blue herons stalking fish with the sun glinting off of their feathers and dark clouds behind them. i came back to my log and watched the sunset and i was the last one to leave. the park ranger had to tell me he was closing the gate. i left just as the sun made the sky a wonder to behold. and it had changed everything for me that day.