förbannelse

moving is hades. moving alone is hades x2. saying 'hades' is my new thing along with 'shut it'. (it's the pioneer woman's blog. she's rubbing off on me.) i should manage a way to work both of those into my speech for budsie's weddin. back to the hades of moving. it's the horridness of moving but no one to share it with. i miss my fam. i miss karey. i miss elicia. i miss heather. it's so much more bearable when you've got a pal to roll up their sleeves and dig in with you. who bear the stress and the burden of it all with you. i mean i'm getting help. the elder's quarum is going to load up the van on sat am and lisa is going to help me unload on sun am. but it's the actual moving i feel lonely about. lonliness is hades.

i should clarify that i did not get 'shut it' from the pioneer woman's blog. i got it from myself. i like to say it at work especially to shan (sean). "hey shan, shut it." i say jubilantly. and sometimes shan doesn't know what to say in reply and so i win--he shuts it. then i give a smug little smile perhaps accompanied by a chortle.

today at work a member gave me some roses from her garden. peach rose buds. i was instructed to put them in my hair so i did. you know who loves peach roses? martha and the muffins. this is something i learned on our sunny summer evening walk when martha sans the muffins was visiting me around a month ago. i enjoyed her visit. we made rosettes and went for a walk and did stretches. she even did a load of my whites and folded my rat-a-tat-tats in such a nice neat way that i've since tried to replicated it and failed.

i ate more than one brownie today and i regret it deeply.

i've also begun to realize that the cargo van is not as wide and spacious as i imagined. i hope there's some super duper packers like my brother layne in the elder's quarum. layne's a super duper packer. he's got the methodical gene. i have a partial methodical gene that shows up in wild and wooly ways. like how to eat a pancake or eat gram's chocolate chip cookies or how to slice an onion. i seem to methodical surrounding food. and doing the dishes.

it's almost a week to go until budsie's wedding. i still need SHOES. do not be alarmed. i am alarmed enough for all of us.

this morning edith killed two wolf spiders in her room. i like to think wolf spiders are limited to edith's room. edith leaves tomorrow and she won't be back until she's flying to the african continent in september.

i joined the stake choir last sunday. they're singing beautiful arrangements of beautiful songs and it's nice to be in a choir when my voice isn't so starkly alone much of the time. but also i felt intimidated because i'm just a mediocre and i felt like i was with the allstars. also i can't go next week. i can't go the week after that and if i visit nanaimo before sarah moves to middle earth canada, i can't go the next week. that leaves one week i can show up to. so should i quit the allstars choir? probably. but it would be so fun to sing in stake conference and make friends at choir. last week i felt like the only one who didn't know anyone (except i knew brenda nee. mclaren but we didn't know each other really well and i knew robyn burgess the piano player when i was a youth and john's old friend grant was there too but i don't know these people. it's strange being in the surrey stake again.