i've been padding up and down the back stairs in bare feet and my pjs to do various things like my laundry and take the recycling out. it's such a nice night. i can smell the grass and my back yard feels safe and feels like home. i was tempted to get a blanket and lay on it and look up at the emerging stars. but i went upstairs and folded my whites while watching that earl show. (i kind of like it but the brother usually bugs me a lot.) i'm really going to miss this place. this place feels like home to me.

i've had a lot on my mind lately. i've been thinking and thinking and trying to be smart about things but the thing is, i just don't have a lot of intelligence when it comes to some things. (i said 'thing(s) 3 times in that sentence).

we were having a wine and cheese today at work after hours. we invited local politicians and employers in our program and media people and things like that. i did many a lovely and artistically arranged fruit platter and cheese and cracker platter this afternoon. i'm known to be particular in the kitchen. i like things a certain way and i'm often the one in charge of whatever is being made, especially if it's a new recipe. tanya always bugs me about my pickiness and i guess i don't always realize what a bossy control freak i can be. like today i was cutting the watermelon and tanya started arranging it on the platter but she was unsure and kept asking me and at first i was all "i don't care, just do whatever." but then i was all "try this.... do this... let's trade spots." hahaha. sue had a vision for one of the fruit platters and she's particular and bossy just like me so we kind of gave each other the wary eye but mostly did not enfringe on each other's circles. she did show me a nicer way to cut the oranges and i gracefully conceded that her way was better. this fact gives me hope for myself. sue was very particular about some of the cheeses and kept telling us how to do them (a fact which really bugged lisa, her being the boss of our unit after all), but that was ok because we didn't have much experience presenting cheeses other than cheddar and moza... you know. lisa kept herself busy cleaning so as not to explode. i only stayed until 6:30 to drop one of my trasitional employment guys off so he could present his employer with a certifricate. i'm glad i didn't have to stay for the whole thing. i was so tired when i got home, i put on some laundry and melted some dark chocolate with peanut butter and spread it on some bread and didn't care. still don't.

i'm so glad it's spring. i love spring. i love the warmth, the smell of flowers on the air, the buds and the grass, the light in the morning and at night. i love driving with my windows down and sleeping with my window open. i love leaving for the gym/work and hearing the birds chirp and the sun rising over the mountains. i love the feeling of freedom that comes with spring. free to have naked feet and bare legs, freedem to be outside and to breath deeper. yah, i love spring a lot.