yesterday i emerged from this room, where i had been downloading music and listening to it to answer the door. my hands were frozen and i had the shivers. it was erin, a friend of chandra's from school who i agreed to meet. she needed to interview me as someone who works in the mental health field. she was a quiet girl with glasses. i could see her and chandra being friends. so i got her a glass of water, got myself a blanket to quell the shivers and she asked her questions and i blah blah blahed about work and that was it.

the day before i had made one of my favourites--cuban black beans and when erin left i entered the kitchen with black beans on my mind. i got out my flour tortillas, heated one up in the pan until it was a little crispy, because i find crispy a pleasing texture, melted some havarti (this week's cheese of choice) and put a couple warmed up dollups of cuban black beans and rice on top of that, rolled it up and ate it. mmmmmm. elicia's offering of veggies for the day was cut up raw carrots, cucumber and celery. i put that on the side and took my plate of black bean roll ups to the living room, grabbed my blankie from the orange interviewee chair and settled down in the green-chair-or-nearchair for the night. when i'm tired like that it's nice to settle down and be cozy in front of the tv and let the limbs rest. i watched bill, pamela and tamara on the six oh clock news, began knitting during entertainment tonight, which is when elicia arrived with her mom. her mom's visiting for the weekend. elicia had to leave for an appointment and her mom opted to stay here. sarita, linda and heather being in more sociable moods than i, took her into the kitchen and talked and laughed with her while they all ate. i sat grateful that i was left to my solitude for the moment. later during jeprody elicia's mom, (her name is helen and her brother calls her hell's bells, a fact which we enjoy) came in and she watched it with me. i got a couple right and she kept saying "laura you should be on the show! you would have won some money!" she didn't like one of the guys. she said "he wouldn't be very fun would he? he doesn't even smile. he's not the smiley type." ha ha. randy showed up during jeprody and he and helen chatted politely about the weather. she had already told me about her ferry ride and catching the bus. she barely caught it and her catch phrase was "and boy, was i on a mission!" in her efforts to catch it. i got to hear the account a couple of times. i dont' know, you just have to have met elicia's mom. she's hilarious. just the way she talks. during a commercial when we were all watching survivor (she had been instructed in the no talking during survivor rule which she seemed to believe was my doing, and i'm not going to deny that i have a part in it.) she asked if randy was linda's boyfriend. we all laughed and said "NO!". "oh, i thought he was somebody's boyfriend" said helen all confused. "mom, no he's nobody's boyfriend." explained elicia. we all laughed and randy said ruefully "the story of my life."

i finished my knitting during csi, and i was free handed during er. it was a devastating er, no doubt about it. at the end when abby was crying and angry and saying so to luca i almost cryed, but i was stopped short in my sympathetic grief by luca. he kissed her in the middle of it. guys. they know sure know how to ruin a good cry. a good pouring out of a soul with some kind of physicality.

i didn't even watch lloyd. i was tired so i went to bed, read my six pages, and feel deep asleep. it was nice to wake on my own devises this morning. it was a slow and lazy surfacing into wakefullness and a rare opportunity at that. eventually i propped myself up in the pillows and read about the amazing anti-nephi-lehis who lay down their lives rather than take the life of their brethren. who loved much and feared to sin more than fearing death. a good reading.