today i was devestated to learn that i can't get my hair cut for two weeks. TWO weeks!! crazy. unheard of. but i need to now. this very minute. it's soooooooooooo naughty. like i mean a total big gigantic baseball size knot in the back of my head. this causes difficulties to arise in the shower. like it takes ten minutes just to get my hand free of the tangled web my hair has become. speaking of webs, i was sitting on the couch this morning reading my scriptures and this small wolf spider, which is a good size compared to his other spiderbruthas, crawls up the back of the couch right beside my leg. i just looked at it. i looked around for a killing impliment. didn't see one. let it go. i was sooprized i didn't act just a little more like a scaredy-cat, but i think it was because it wasn't the monster size and it was headed away from me and i was just too lazy to get something to kill it with. speaking of monster size spiders, karey and i were at metro town today doin some shawping (i like shawping spelled this way.), when i happened to look over at the kiosk where i bought fatima's butterflies in a frame last year, and what should meet my horrified gaze but black furry spiders the size of my head in frames. what is with people?? i experienced a long shudder down my spine and some creepy crawlies to say the least. had to avert the gaze and go on. speaking of going on, did you know that they sell edibles in fruits and passion? they do. unFORTUNATELY, their green apple products don't smell like green apple at all. was quite disappointed at this. also when i was finished fingering the edible goods, but with no harm done to them whatsoever the worker-i'm-bored-with-nothing-to-do-but-stare-at-customers-guy rushed over and fiddled amongst them. ok well i dropped the little wooden knife, but i picked up before the ten second/five minute/whatever rule was up and put it exactly where it was before. something to be proud of: i only tried on 4 things at old navy. ya! i mean i could take it all in with me at once! and i wasn't in the changing room for almost an hour or anything. proud proud day. today at lunch i sat with this guy. it was just me and him at the table because the other one the kitchen workers usually sit at was full. he likes to pour my water for me, so he did and then we were eating in pretty much silence, and then he says "you're hair is pretty." "thanks" i say in return, still focused on my taco salad. there's a pause. "sometimes you are beautiful". i know what you're thinking 'sometimes'?? :) well so was i, and so i asked "sometimes?" and he said "yes. sometimes you are beautiful... in my eyes." well alright then. i smiled and said thank you. the guy has something there. i mean it's only once in a while that i ever feel actually beautiful. a rare glimpse. other times i fluctuate between my severe inner critic and my accepting like yourself anyways/ like your imperfections optimist in the way that i see myself. fluctuation. i have an urge to spell it 'flunctuation'. yesterday steve and i grocery shawpped. i bought thirty two dollars of produce at kin's. that's the most i've ever spent there. you could say i went nutso on the fruits and veggies. you could say i went ballistic. i've been missing fresh food. then at safeway i beat ol steve-oh-mr."how many things do you have on your list?-whiny-pants. because basically, i rock. and who doesn't know what monopolize means? please. the point is, that 'monopolize the fridge' can have different applications. that's my point. that's what i'd like to say about that. after all the grocerygoodtimes were had, we had chicken burgers and watched charlie chaplin. charlie was a surprise to me. i never had the urge to watch charlie, but when i did watch charlie i liked him quite a bit. yesterday we watched modern times. there's this one scene with the automatic feeder gone awry... ahhh i laughed so hard i was crying and my stomach hurt. it was a long laugh too. sustainable laughter. he's pretty amazing, this charlie fellow. k. well i'm going to go squish under my fluffy covers. go well umfandisi. stay well my friend